Style

You're here now, giving me your company as I go through my day. It may seems like its nothing, but to me, its a sign that you actually care. But, because of this, I'm scared that I might fall into that dark abyss called, love.

I've been in that abyss before, a couple of times. I didn't enjoy them one bit, and yet, I can't seem to forget them. Because in the end, no one was there to pull me out; help from the darkness. Because  in the end, they all left me there, or even on one occasion, I left myself there.

This time, I'm about to fall into that dark abyss again, and I'm holding onto a thread that might decide how my dear heart will end up. Broken? whole but with a few scars? or loved?

The thing is, I don't want whatever it is that's happening. I'm fighting a-what seems to be losing-battle that will end in the next three months. Plus, I don't think he's completely there. It may seems like he is, but I know that he isn't. It is painful to have such thought, but hey, I'm just a hormonal teenage girl who also has feelings of her own.

So, if he isn't even there to begin with, why am I still falling? why do I still ache for his company every day?

If he won't stay in the end, why should I even bother?